The lies, selfishness and scheming that usually accompany infidelity are upsetting and vindictive. It would be far easier if the partner who was cheating was honest beforehand, and admitted that he/she was unhappy in the relationship. Obviously I know that we do not live in a perfect world and that this does not always happen. I do think however, that sometimes people do not admit they want the relationship to end, as they are not entirely sure if they do or not. Maybe they just want to see if the grass is greener on the other side, before finalising a life changing decision. In some cases people just want to have their cake and eat it, or in other words, have the best of both worlds. Either way infidelity is wrong!
In some circumstances infidelity may not be so bad. For example, if you are 16 or 17 and your partner kisses someone else, that is not really that bad. Yes, it would still cause hurt and unhappiness in the same way, but the relationship would probably not be a serious one at such a young age, and I doubt there would be any serious commitments to take into account. On the other hand, if you have been married for many years and have a mortgage, house and children, the damage caused by infidelity would be more severe. I consider marriage to be a serious commitment and there are many more important issues to contemplate, such as the children, and the upset it would cause them. I don’t think infidelity is purely about sex, although I am sure that it plays a large part in it. In some circumstances people just get bored and want to experience the excitement of new things. It is human nature! I believe just as many women commit adultery as men do, women probably just don’t boast about it as much as men and they are more likely to be better liars.
I found it interesting to read that infidelity may be in some people’s genetic makeup. I am not sure what to make of this; can someone really be programmed to be unfaithful? Apparently research shows that it is possible. I would be more inclined to think that external social factors and family backgrounds would contribute more to infidelity. If children are brought up in an environment where adultery is committed, or portrayed as normal, they may be more likely to be unfaithful in a relationship. Perhaps that works in the opposite way too; children who have had personal experience of the pain and grief infidelity causes it may encourage them not to want to put their own family through that. Whether infidelity is in the genes or not, I imagine some have tried to use that as an excuse to escape the consequences.
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